A part of being confident is not giving into aggression – yours or anyone’s. We want to stand up for ourselves, but we don’t want to be pushy, be a bully, unreasonable or be perceived as a jerk. Kevin Hogan’s newsletter offered this excellent advice on being assertive without being aggressive:

Do’s and Don’ts of Assertive Behavior

Do:
Use Intelligent Communication
Exude Calm
Use Good Eye Contact
Be Aware of Body Language
Use a Confident Voice

Don’t:
Make Unreasonable Demands
Be Hostile
Use a Haughty Voice or Manner
Belittle the Other Person
Put the Other Person on the Defensive
Build Your Confidence to Become more Assertive

In order to be assertive, you will need to develop confidence in yourself. It is easier if you try to take this one step at a time. Let’s start off by just doing one small step and work from there.

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